|
"The Prince Bride"Written By: ShenLong & DBZVelena Disclaimer: Neither DBZVelena or ShenLong own
in any way, shape, form or matter any rights to the Movie/Book "The
Princess Bride" All rights remain with Act III Communications
and William Goldman, the appropriate copyright owners. This story
is purely for entertainment purposes, no money is being made here.
This fic, "The Prince Bride" is based on this movie/book
but with several twists and Yaoi content. This fic also contains many
direct quotes and scenes from the movie/book. Rating: Since both stories are rated PG.-13 and this fic is based on them. Most of the fic will be PG.-13. However be careful to check individual chapters to be sure. (Shenny might add a lemon, you never know...) Warnings: Violence, romance, lime, fluff, cheesy-ness, AU, OOC, and lots more. Pairings: Lots! *snicker* Authors notes: DBZVelena: I'm the one that gotten
the idea to do this and I nagged Shen until she said, she'd help me.
And if you know me a lil bit, you knew there was no escape. So finally
after she too saw the movie and told me she'd help, I started work
on it right away. A Yaoi story based on the Movie/book The Princess Bride and Gundam Wing. This story is brought to you by the combined efforts of DBZVelena and ShenLong. Archive: www.gundam-wing-diaries.150m.com www.DBZVelena's Madhouse.com Anyone else please ask.
"The Prince Bride" Commenced. 2003 ShenLong & DBZ Velena Chapter 22 "Brains, Steel, Speed"
Wufei paused to catch his breath, Duo’s spirit gazed longingly towards the castle itself and his love hidden somewhere inside. Trowa snuck a look over the top of the battlements at the scene below. “We’re fucked.” “Eh?” Wufei turned to see what the hell Trowa was going on about as he tried to prop Duo’s body against the wall. “If that’s thirty Maganacs, then I’m seriously going to complain to the education department. The math teacher they gave me must have been past his use by date.” Wufei did a quick mental calculation. “I think you should demand your money back. There’s no way in hell there’s thirty, big, muscular men there.” “Exactly. Looks more like sixty to me. As I said, we’re fucked.” “Oh well, thirty, sixty, what’s the difference?” Wufei shrugged. “The last time I checked the difference between thirty and sixty was thirty. That means double the enemy and double the pain for us I’d say,” Trowa replied. “Do not worry, my friend. We have a secret weapon.” “We do? I haven’t seen any weapon. Are you hiding something from me?” Trowa reached forward and began to ‘frisk’ Wufei. “Ack! Stop it, that tickles. Ohhh...” Wufei’s eyes suddenly crossed. “No, that’s not a secret weapon,” he panted, “Although it has been called a weapon before...” Trowa withdrew his hand, a smirk on his face. “You can strike me down later with it,” he promised. “But for now, what is this weapon you keep sprouting on about?” “Him.” “Him?” Trowa was completely confused now. “Me?” squeaked Duo from where he was sitting on the battlements still gazing longingly at the castle. “In case it’s skipped your attention, I’m kinda out of it right now. Yeah, really out of it as in an ‘out of body experience’ I’d say.” “But he’s mostly dead,” Trowa stated. Wufei stuck his hand in his pocket and pulled out the miracle pill that G had given them, along with a tube of lube. “Come on, help me out here. We’ll have to give him the pill.” “I don’t think it’s been fifteen minutes yet. G did say to wait for fifteen minutes and the big hand on my watch has only moved from the twelve as far as the number two. I’m pretty sure that means only two minutes has passed.” Wufei rolled his eyes. “That means ten minutes has passed. Every numeral is equal to five minutes, not the value of the number.” Trowa scratched his head. “Well shit. That means all this time I’ve been running late. No wonder I’ve missed all my favorite telly programs.” Turning back to Wufei, he continued, “You reckon you can teach me to tell the time properly then?” “If we don’t hurry up and do something here then time is going to be the least of our worries,” Wufei muttered. “Look, don’t worry about the time for now, give me hand here. You hold his mouth open and I’ll slip him the pill.” “Oh, okay.” Trowa reached for Duo’s mouth and placing his fingers and thumb on Duo’s jaw, he squeezed gently, Duo’s mouth opening. “Good.” Wufei stuffed the pill into Duo’s mouth. Trowa released Duo’s jaw and began to massage his throat. “What are you doing?” “Helping him to swallow.” “He’s a human, not an animal.” Trowa shrugged and then gave a triumphant smile as Duo swallowed. Wufei shook his head. “Come on, give me a hand with this.” Wufei grabbed the tube of lube and began to open the top. Taking one look at what Wufei was up to, Trowa’s eyes glazed over and he began to remove his pants. “What are you doing now?” Wufei asked, his eyes as wide as saucers. “I was about to ask the same thing,” muttered spirit Duo. “I must say, he’s not bad though.” Spirit Duo’s eyes raked over the lower half of the man, appreciation evident in his smirk and he licked his ghostly lips. “Correct me if I’m wrong,” Trowa began in his ‘patient’ voice, “But that is a tube of lube, is it not?” “Well, yes.” “And every time you have a tube of lube it means I’m gonna get some. Correct?” “Well...” “So, I’m just getting ready.” “Trowa, put your pants back on! This time the lube is for him, not you,” Wufei growled. Trowa’s head jerked up and a hurt look flashed across his face. “You’d rather fuck a corpse than me?” “Well, he is rather handso- NO! That’s not what this is about at all. Of course I’d much rather screw you, but we need the lube to put on his suction wounds.” “Ah.” Relief flooded Trowa’s eyes. “Come on, hurry up and help me here. The wedding is in half an hour and we need to rescue Heero from Relena’s clutches.” Trowa managed to get Duo’s corpse propped up against the wall then turned his attention back to Wufei who had opened Duo’s shirt. “How long do we have to wait before we know if the miracle pill works?” “No idea. Now, stop flapping your lips and help me here. We need to get these suction wounds covered as quickly as possible.” Trowa took the lube and began to smear it over one of Duo’s nipples, Wufei was doing the same to the other one. Within a minute or two the pair had all but finished. Trowa paused and looked to Wufei who met his gaze with one of his own. “We have to cover all the suction wounds?” Trowa whispered with a pointed look at Duo’s crotch. “Ummm, yes,” replied Wufei. The pair looked at each other, then to Duo’s crotch and then back to each other. Spirit Duo watched, a touch horrified. “Great, just what I really need right now, a pair of horny saviors and I can’t enjoy it as I’m not solid.” Without further words being spoken, both Wufei and Trowa plunged their lube covered hands into Duo’s pants. “How long do we have to do this for?” Trowa moaned. He was seriously getting turned on here. “No clue, just keep going and hope his soul is still in his body.” “What if it’s not?” “Then this whole exercise is a total waste.” “Mmmm... I wouldn’t say that,” Trowa purred and began to eye off his partner. Spirit Duo’s eyes suddenly started to cross and a soft moan escaped his lips. Pleasure – he could feel pleasure. He tilted his head back, closed his eyes and began to pant. At that moment, his spirit was suddenly hauled back into his physical body. “Oh god. That’s it, more, keep going. Stop now and I’ll rip you apart, take you both on together,” Duo moaned as his head thrashed from side to side. Suddenly his eyes opened and he jerked. “What the hell? Why have you got your hands down my pants?” “Guess the party’s over,” Trowa mumbled as he withdrew his hand. “Shame,” muttered Wufei. “You’re alive?” he asked as if to confirm the visual. “Of course. I am Shinigami after all,” Duo replied. “You can’t kill death. Err... How come my arms won’t move?” “Well, that’s probably because you’ve been mostly dead all day. I’d say it will take a while for the blood to start flowing properly again,” replied Trowa. “We had Miracle G make up a pill to return you to the living,” Wufei explained. “Oh yeah, I remember that.” Duo shuddered. “It was pretty creepy from where I was. Where’s Heero?” Wufei looked into the violet eyes. “I’ll explain what’s been happening since you snuffed it.” He lowered his eyes, thought about all the events that had happened and then raised his eyes again. “On second thoughts, I’d better sum up, it would take a couple of hours to bring you right up to date. Now, let me see... Ah, yes. Relena is set to marry Heero in just under half an hour. All we have to do is storm the castle, disrupt the wedding, snitch Heero and make our escape after I’ve sorted out a few things with Lord Treize.” “I see. That doesn’t leave much time to fool around, does it?” Duo replied. “That depends on who you’re fooling around with,” Wufei muttered. Duo dropped his eyes and noticed his middle finger twitching. “Hey, you just moved your middle finger,” Trowa stated as he gazed in awe. “Yeah, well, I’ve always been a quick healer and when you want to flip someone off it gives you added incentive,” Duo muttered as he managed to get his middle finger to stand upright and look pointedly at Wufei. Taking a brief moment to recover from the exertion, Duo spoke again. “What are our options for entry?” “There’s only one and that’s the front gate,” Wufei replied and with Trowa’s assistance they managed to get Duo raised up enough so his head could flop back over the top of the wall and see the front gate. Unfortunately his head connected with the stone and he gave a yelp of pain. “Coming back to mortality sure sucks some times,” he mumbled, unable to even rub his head better. “As you can see, it’s guarded by sixty men.” “Sixty? I thought the Maganac core only had forty?” he muttered to himself. “What are our assets?” “Wufei has about eight inches, I’ve got nine - Oh, sorry, not those assets, ah, okay.” Trowa blushed. Wufei ignored the elf/man. “Your brains, Trowa’s speed and my steel. Eight inches? I’ll have you know I’ve more than that!” Duo looked a little stunned for a second. “Eight and nine inches, hey? Hmmm...” he whispered to himself, then jerked back to the real world as Wufei’s words hit home. “Is that it? My brain, your speed, your steel and twenty five inches between us?” “Twenty five inches?” questioned Trowa, a little flummoxed. “Yeah, your nine, his eight and my eight; that all added up to twenty five when I went to school,” Duo muttered, then continued, “This is going to be impossible. Maybe if I had a month or ten to plan I could come up with something, but this, to wing it, go in by the seat of our pants...” He shook his head from side to side. “Ohh, you just shook your head,” Trowa announced, a smile gracing his mouth. “Doesn't that make you happy?” “No, but it did get rid of the ringing in my ears. Shit; brains, speed and steel against what should be forty but is now sixty Maganacs and you’re getting all excited about a head shake? Now if we were to have a wheelbarrow, that would be something to get all excited about. Oh, maybe a pair of handcuffs, leather harness and a whip too.” “We can get that from the Thieves forest, it’s currently vacant,” said Wufei. “Then why the hell didn’t you say so in the first place?” Duo groaned. “Shit, what I wouldn’t give for a holocaust cloak too.” “Can’t help you there,” Wufei shrugged. Trowa reached inside his pants and pulled out a black cloak. Both Wufei and Duo stared at him in disbelief. “What?” Trowa questioned, then his face curved into a devious grin. “You all thought Heero was the only one with spandex space?” “I don’t want to know,” muttered Wufei and shook his head. Duo sighed. “Okay, come on and help me up.” Trowa and Wufei each grabbed an arm and pulled Duo to his feet. “I’ll also need a sword eventually,” Duo stated. “Why? You couldn’t hold a butter knife right now,” Wufei snipped. “True, but they don’t know that.” Duo’s head flopped back, Trowa grabbing his hair and pushing his head back again. “Thanks. Now, there could be a few problems when we get inside.” “Tell me about it,” Wufei muttered. “Firstly I have to find Quatre, then Lord Treize, once I’ve found them I need to find you again, not to mention getting back out.” Trowa elbowed his partner. “Shut up with the ranting already, he’s had a hard day.” “Ah, yeah. Okay.” The three sneak along the battlements again, each locked in their own thoughts when a soft whisper is heard. “Wufei?” “What?” “I hope we win.” * * * Heero sat staring into the mirror, still in his green tank top and tight, black spandex shorts. His dark hair fell naturally around his face, highlighting the serene look in his eyes. A pair of hands came from behind and fastened black choker to his neck and then paused to stroke over the bronzed flesh. Heero flinched a little with the touch. “You don’t seem to be at all excited, or ready, my little stud muffin,” Relena cooed. “Should I be?” Heero asked with a glare. “Well, grooms are usually dressed in a tuxedo or the like and quite happy; or so I’m told,” replied Relena as she eyed the tux all set out and untouched on the bed. Heero turned to look at the woman and had to shade his eyes against the volume of pink. “I will not marry tonight,” he stated quietly. “My Duo will save me, he will come for me, he promised to always come for me and he’s only done it the once so there’s a lot of catching up to do. Besides, I’m sure there’s a self destruct button somewhere around here if all else fails.” Relena snorted and turned away. * * * Back up on the battlements, Wufei, Trowa and Duo had managed to get a little closer and peered down at the Maganac core guarding the front entrance, Rashid standing front and center. “This is gonna be it,” Wufei muttered and put his hand out “To success,” Trowa said and placed his hand on top of Wufei’s. Duo managed to roll his shoulder back and forth, gaining enough momentum to swing his arm up and over, smacking down hard on both his companions’ hands before ricocheting off and smacking himself in the face. ~ * ~ tbc... |
